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The No-Resolution New Year’s Resolution

in Filmmaking
on Jan 2, 2013

I have never made a New Year’s resolution in my life and am not about to start now. I guess I always figured that things would just fall into place on their own; that my weak, frail and sickly looking body would magically morph into a more healthy and muscular build overnight, that I would stop spending most of my savings on cheap booze, drugs and cigarettes on a whim or perhaps try to be nicer to those I dislike. Maybe I felt that I would just grow tired of my own lifestyle and change things up. Maybe I was just too lazy to change. To me, New Year’s resolutions are nothing but a way to drive yourself insane during the month of January, because let’s face it, most of us stop caring around Valentine’s Day anyway. Unfortunately, most of the time, each year is the same and we are stuck wandering down the same vicious path we’ve been walking for year after year after year. So here is my advice, don’t make a resolution! Sounds crazy right? Well, just hear me out for a minute…

Personally for me, 2012 wasn’t that much of a bad year to be honest. I was fortunate enough not to have anyone close to me pass away, stayed relatively healthy, shot almost a dozen short films, had some of my work be released on DVD, got to work beside so many amazing artists and other filmmakers, and even put together a week long Film Festival that turned out to be a great success. When the beginning of 2012 came rolling around, I certainly would have never thought that any of these things would have happened and looking back at it, glad that I didn’t. It would’ve scared me. I may have cowardly ran away out of intimidation, but thankfully ignorance is bliss and the future is a mystery!

Sure there are many things I “hope” happen during this next year, but am not going to use such trivial desires as a way to determine whether the year will be a good one or not. Things such as obtaining a better video camera (my Hi8 finally kicked the bucket, which may have been the ultimate low of my life in 2012) would be a start. Yet, I have always made my films work, even without any budget and lack of good equipment, so why be bummed out now? Another film festival may be nice, but we’ll see when the time comes. It’s like putting your dreams on indefinite hiatus. I just want to think about today right now. As long as you keep pushing on and stay productive, you’re on the right track. Ok, enough with this self help lesson and back on track…

What really depresses me are the people who complain that they wished they had done this and that before the year ended. Whether it be making a film, going on vacation, or skydiving, you still have time people! Opposed to what the Mayans believed, the world did NOT actually end so keep at it. Don’t wait until your bucket list begins to overflow, just keep pushing on with everything while you still have a chance. I guess a big part of my feelings towards this topic stem from watching my Father, who eventually lost his eight-year fight with cancer a few years ago. During his time sick, he never took a step forward without thinking about each day specifically first, nor did he live out his final days in regret of not doing one thing or another. Imagine how annoying it would be to try and fulfill your New Year’s Resolution while knowing that death is just a few months if not weeks away? So why would you put yourself in that position at all?

For me, as long as I can continue making films no matter how difficult it has become, and continue living out my dream life as an independent filmmaker, even if my diet consists of expired canned foods and stale bread, I will be happy. After all, the high life is only a state of mind. So don’t bring your productivity down by setting up meaningless goals to reach, they will only cause you to stumble, and perhaps, in the worst case scenario, miss other opportunities as you’re trying to reach them. Have determination and some faint idea as to what you are looking to accomplish, sure, but don’t ever let yourself get so militant in making a New Year’s Resolution, because for the most part, they will only become a distraction and most likely a disappointment at the end of the year, causing for a lifelong case of soul crippling depression! Live for the moment people! What only seems right to me after reaching this conclusion is that nothing can really change, so put your whole heart into whatever you’re doing at the moment without believing that the next year will magically connect loose ends and make your dreams come true. It’s just another day after all! So keep smoking, hell move up to a pack a day, crack open another MD 20/20 and stay try to stay focused! Things will not get easier! I promise.

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