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WHACK JOBS

The Washington Post runs its obligatory Sopranos story this week with David Segal’s “Death by Script,” a surprisingly entertaining look at the actors whose careers have taken a hit when their characters have been rubbed out on the show.

Here’s actor John Fiore describing the events after he received the sad phone call from Sopranos creator David Chase:

In an instant, Fiore knew he was a dead man. Well, his character was a dead man, and that meant his “Sopranos” gig was over, which for an actor is like getting whacked for real. Fiore did what anyone confronting a killer would do — he begged for his life.

“I said no, no, no, you do not have to do this,” he recalls. “You do not have to do this. You are the writer, you are the producer. This is [bunk]. Kill somebody else!”

Chase was apologetic but unmoved. Nothing personal. It’s just what the story demands.

Easing into the acceptance stage of death, Fiore asked how he would expire, and suddenly the news went from merely awful to absurdly awful. “At first,” he says, “I thought it was a really bad joke.”

It wasn’t. Chase wanted Fiore’s character to die of a heart attack on the toilet. On the toilet. No machine-gun ambush, like Sonny Corleone, murdered at a tollbooth in “The Godfather.” No, for Gigi Cestone, it’d be a coronary on the throne. Does it get more humiliating?

“It was highly disagreeable to me,” says Fiore, who sounds surprisingly bitter, five years after leaving the show. “But David said, ‘No, this is memorable, this is different.’ ” So Fiore sucked it up, died on cue, and on his last day, the cast and crew handed him a signed toilet seat, which he didn’t find very amusing. A year or so later, he ran into Chase, who asked if the “Sopranos” stint had helped his career.

“I said, actually, it didn’t help me at all. And my kids have to listen to people in school say, ‘Ha ha, your dad died on the toilet.’ “

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